Retirement

Last night we had our winter comp touch football grand final. Having not won a competition in about three years and losing our last grand final, I'm happy to report we managed a 4-3 win. I spent most of the second half wishing the game would hurry up and finish as I was so nervous about maintaining our lead.
After the game I announced that I'd be hanging up my boots. My continued frustration at not being able to play effectively, the ongoing degeneration of my hand/arm function and my feeling of being a burden to the team combined until I knew it was the right decision. Hopefully it's not a permanent decision, and my health improves enough for me to make a comeback, but until then I don't think it's fair on myself or the team to keep playing.

Thanks to the great staff at my neurosurgeon's office I'm off to see the doctor on Friday. I'm guessing I'll be off to get some tests after that, then jump back into the queue to see him again, after which I can see three possible scenarios:

• I have some form of operation
• I start some form of therapy
• I do nothing

Of these, the third is the least palatable. Knowing I have the potential for my health to worsen and not be able to do anything about is a particularly is extremely frustrating for someone like myself who thrives on knowledge and information - the many variables and unanswerable questions constantly tick away in my brain. At least in three days or so time I'll know a little more.